Connery to Play Bond Villain!?

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Sean Connery - New James Bond VillainSeptugenarian Scot, Sean Connery has expressed interest in becoming a Bond villain opposite Daniel Craig in one of the four new Bond movies Craig has signed up to do. The actor, best known as the original Bond, (a role which skyrocketed him to fame as a movie legend), has been so impressed with the new Bond’s debut that he’s just itching to face him! There’s only one problem though, he doesn’t think they could afford him:

“I wouldn’t mind coming back as a Bond villain,” he said. “But I don’t think they would pay me enough money.”

Preliminary talks between the production company and the aged thesbian have been taking place since two years ago when Daniel Craig reprised the role in Casino Royale.

“I think Daniel Craig is a terrific choice,” said Connery. “I think they’re going back to a more realistic type of Bond movie as I don’t think they could have gone much further with the special effects.”

Personally I think it would be a cracking idea for Connery to come back in the opposite role. They could explain away the notion of why so many people have played Bond by showing that there is life after MI:6, albeit a Marlon-Brando-in-Apocalypse-Now type existence. A bit like in Goldeneye with Alec Trevelyan going bad – this time an ex-Bond goes bad.

A message to the producers: pay him some money! People want to see this!

Full Story: The Daily Mail

Dressing Up

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Dressing Up - Polly Pirate Comic Strip Cartoon

Back-to-Front Thong Man Gets Fine

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David Batchelor FinedIt’s about time for some more weird news. This story comes to us from BBC News Scotland:

A 58-year-old man who fed pigeons wearing only a skimpy thong which was back to front has been fined £150.

Neighbours spotted David Batchelor in his street in Perth in the underwear which left his genitals partly exposed. Perth Sheriff Court heard that children walking home from school had been passing by at the time.

His lawyer said that Batchelor had been drunk and there was no sexual element to the way he had behaved. He admitted committing a breach of the peace. When officers had turned up to investigate they found Batchelor still partially dressed and with his flimsy thong on the wrong way round.

The Full Story: BBC News

The mind boggles. Who goes out to feed the birds a pie anyway? And then while dressed in only a thong that’s on the wrong way round??

Woman Spent 2 Years Sitting on Boyfriend’s Toilet

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Woman Spent 2 Years on ToiletA 35-year-old woman who apparently spent two years in her boyfriend’s bathroom in Ness City had become stuck to the toilet seat, authorities said Wednesday.

“She was not glued. She was not tied. She was just physically stuck by her body. It is hard to imagine. … I still have a hard time imagining it myself,” Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple said in a telephone interview, adding that it appeared her body fat had grown attached to the seat.

The boyfriend called police on Feb. 27 to report that “there was something wrong with his girlfriend,” Whipple said, adding he never explained why it took him two years to call.

He said the boyfriend had brought the woman food and water during the two years and told investigators he asked her daily to come out of the bathroom.

“And her reply would be, ‘Maybe tomorrow,’” Whipple said. “According to him, she did not want to leave the bathroom.”

The full story.

Mighty Boosh Movie Imminent

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Fresh from winning Sexiest Male at the NME awards, Noel Fielding revealed that not only a fourth series on its way, but also a Mighty Boosh movie!