“Excuse Me, I’m Doing Some Market Research…”

Article By Hudders. Filed under: Humour, Pub Talk

Hudders’ Market ResearchI was just trawling the Interwebs this morning and stumbled across this bizarre story from 2003 when Tucson-based porn site owner, Tyrone Henry, was jailed for “fraud” when he lured two girls into his home, convincing them it was market research for a new face cream he was developing called “White Dew”.

The girls, aged 15 and 16, were told to kneel down, were blindfolded and then “cream” was applied to their faces. Unfortunately for the girls, this wasn’t some revolutionary new exfoliate but was in fact the hot steamy ejaculate of a sad, lonely man.

Bizarrely, these actions aren’t strictly a crime. You can’t charge the guy with sexual assault as he didn’t interfere with them sexually and you can’t get him for indecent exposure because… well… they were blindfolded. The only thing public prosecutor Bill Roach could come up with was a very limp case of fraud.

It strikes me that if you can come up with a crime that nobody has ever done before, you can pretty much get away with it. Without a precedent, there’s not really anything the courts can do to you. If the guy hadn’t told them what he was going to do to them before he blindfolded them, would that still have been fraud? What were they expecting?

Equally, does it swing the other way? What if you accidentally got some semen on someone during your normal everyday life? Are you then guilty of something? I’m not saying I frequently rub jizz on peoples backs when I’m walking down the street but I’d like to know whether the option was available.


Comments...

4 Responses to ““Excuse Me, I’m Doing Some Market Research…””

  1. “What if you accidentally got some semen on someone during your normal everyday life? Are you then guilty of something? I’m not saying I frequently rub jizz on peoples backs when I’m walking down the street but I’d like to know whether the option was available.”

    lol Hudders!!!! :D hahahaha, great article mate. Your mind set is very, very weird. I love it!

  2. This is what I come to expect from noddegamra.co.uk.

    Priceless!

  3. Lol what!?

    Crazy legal systems.

  4. He should have been charged with a sex crime. He knowingly did this. This is just sick and the girl’s should have used some since. Talk about stupid.

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